A Little Appreciation Never Hurt

             So I was sitting in the library studying for my final midterm (FINALLY!) when I started thinking about how many bad things have been happening not just in the world, but also to the people around me, and that have happened to me. And then I thought about how before each of my midterms I always said, “Lord please help me pass this test, I know I should have studied better but please help me get a semi decent grade.” Now for those of you who don’t know me I was born Catholic, personally I don’t identify with it, I’m more of a spiritual person, but then what hit me was that after I would get my results back (I passed 3 out of 5, haven’t gotten my grades for the last 2 yet) I never really said thank you. And then it hit me, I haven’t really shown my appreciation for all of the blessings in my life in a while, and that made me really sad, so I felt what better way to show my appreciation for it than with a blog post! So here are just a couple of the myriad of things/people I have no words to express my appreciation for.

1.     My parents (yes both of them equally)- honestly I don’t know where I would be without these two. They could not be any more different but both have helped form me into the woman I am today, and both have done everything in their power to equip me with all wisdom and opportunities that they felt would help me become the most successful and self-sufficient woman I could be. I will never be able to fully express the gratitude for all of their sacrifices for me over the years.

2.     My friends/family. Yes I set both of them up in the same category, why? Because my best friends have become members of my family, they’ve shown me nothing but unconditional support and have accepted me completely as I am, and to me that matters more than blood.

3.     Anyone and everyone that told me that I couldn’t do something. You pushed me harder than any of my supporters could…why? Because there is nothing I love more than a challenge, and proving someone wrong, for me the sky isn’t even the limit.

4.     All of the mistakes and bad choices that I have made in life. Yeah it sucked in the moment, and the consequences of the aftermath of those choices had to be worse, but ultimately each mistake I made helped shape me and led me to where I am today, and to be completely honest at this point in my life I love where I am, what I’m doing and the future looks bright, so how could I not be thankful for those mistakes.

5.     All of the people who have supported me throughout the years. To be honest this category is mainly made up of family and friends, but I’m beyond thankful for the teachers and professors who have offered me nothing but unconditional regard over the years, pushing me to work harder through their constructive criticism and never letting me bullshit a paper or test, I will never be able to fully show my appreciation for that push.

I think sometimes we (or at least me) get so consumed and busy with our everyday lives that we forget to be appreciative for the little things that keep us going. And this doesn’t just apply to the big gestures, the same appreciation can and should be shown when someone waits a little longer to hold the door open for you, or when someone gives you a genuine compliment, hell even a small smile when you’re having a bad day should be appreciated (I mean come on Philadelphians are known for many things, kindness is not one of them). And we should definitely remember to show appreciation for the people who play central roles in our lives, because although they know you love them, feeling that someone notices and actually appreciates the things you do for them everyday makes life all the better.

A Reso-Promise

     So today’s blog post is going to be a promise of sorts, or maybe a halfway through the semester, no where New Years, New Years resolution…well you can interpret it in whatever way you would like lol. And I have a specific reason why I want to share this not really a resolution but basically a resolution with you, which I will make clear at the end of the post. So ready for the resolution/promise?

     The resolution/promise (legit don’t know how to define it) I want to make is to stop being on my phone so much. Now you might be wondering (well those of you know me semi well lol) why would a person who is studying communication want to not be interacting with the technology that makes communication so accessible? Simple. I want to be more involved in my own life, and be more involved in the lives of the people I love. Say wha?

     Being on campus and doing some assignments involving media use, I’ve come to the conclusion that those devices that once made speaking with a relative that is so far away so feasible, is not the reason that relationships fail and the basis on which we construct our culture. Sitting in a lecture hall for 85 minutes I see students who cannot even put their phone down for 15 minutes to absorb at lease a segment of the lesson that is being taught to them because they need to constantly check what is “going on in the world” when ironically they’re missing what is going on in their own worlds! As a society we have become so engrossed in the need to be updated all the time on what we think we’re missing out on that we actually miss out on the moments that make the best memories, because they are our own moments that should be something we could look back on and we don’t, because we did not take advantage of it.

     Before this semester I felt like I could talk to say my mom or my friends in person and check my Instagram feed or respond to a text message because I could multitask and not miss anything. Well it turns out I was wrong. Now you can say that maybe it’s just me, that I lack the skills to efficiently multitask, but the fact of the matter is you miss the whole point of the face-to-face communication process when you just listen with your ears. Along with hearing what the person is saying, their body language and facial expressions are also contributing to the conversation and that has been completely missed because you were sending that “quick text,” therefore a possible memorable moment is gone.

     Okay so now the reason I’ve put this reso-promise (yes I made the word up since I still can’t decide what to call it) I want you guys to help me ensure that I stick with it. If you’re with me and see me pull out my phone just to scroll call me out on it. If you see me [failing] at multitasking because I’m consistently checking my social media accounts say something. I want you guys to call me out when you see that I slip up and that I’m not going through with my reso-promise, because I really want to follow through with this.

     When I reflect back later on in life I want to ensure that I have a plethora of amazing memories to laugh about because I know that I was able to fully live my life to the fullest, which I know will not happen if social media plays such a big part in my daily life, so it’s time for a change. And who knows maybe I’ll even become a more productive student….wellll one can always dream (;

Won't Settle

So I’ve been contemplating writing this blog post for a while, since in a way it is kind of personal but at the same time I’m like if I’m going through this there has to be plenty of other people who feel the same way…so I’ve decided to just go ahead and write about it. What is it? Is probably what you’re asking right now lol, well hold on I’ll get to that in a second, first I wanna clarify the back story on the catalyst of what made me decide to write about this topic.

            I swear I get asked this all the time do I have a boyfriend, to which I respond no I don’t and then I get one of two responses either the person doesn’t believe me and thinks I have some hidden boyfriend (pssh I wish Romeo you know that’s all you;) [Santos for all people who don’t know the Romeo I’m referring to lol] or they’re like but why not?

            My response to the first response is quite frankly despite the fact that I am a private person (I like my private life to remain private) if I had a boyfriend I wouldn’t keep him a secret, there’s really no need for that and ultimately that secrecy can tear apart a relationship. I’m not a person that would be blowing up anyone’s Instagram feeds with pictures of my boyfriend and I, but my friends and family would definitely know who he was, and publically people would know I was taken, but according to my Facebook status I’m currently single so obviously I have no secret boyfriend.

            My response to that second response gets a little more complicated. The reason that I don’t have a boyfriend is not because I don’t want one, I mean I’m not actively seeking a relationship, but should I meet the right person I wouldn’t be opposed to dating, the only problem is the guys of this generation. Honestly, I’ve met some pretty good guys, but the majority of them were either already taken or weren’t interested in girls which sucked…and the rest of the guys I’ve met just were not interested in something serious. I’m not the type of girl that is looking for just another hookup or to “chill” (honestly what even is this whole thing with chilling, like I’m not your bro). And I don’t want a guy who has been with half of the Philadelphia Metropolitan Area (being with thatttt many people is kind of a huge turn off).

            Honestly what I want is a man, not a boy thinking he’s a man, to ask me out on a DATE (again chill is for bro’s) and not to want a relationship per say, but who wants to get to know the actual me, not just the physical me or the me that he thinks I am. I want a man who is going to call instead of text me and who is going to understand that I am a full time student working two jobs, so I don’t have much time, and who instead of being turned off by that is going to stand by me and support me through it all. A person who wants me to succeed and pushes me to be a better version of myself….is that too much to ask for? Cause to be honest I refuse to settle for anything less than that.

Naps, A Journey, and an Apology

So first I want to start off by saying how sorry I am for neglecting my blog for so long (almost two months like whaa), honestly I have no excuse but to say that I’ve been crazy busy…but the fact of the matter is I can’t even use that as an excuse. To be honest I just didn’t have much to write about my life has and still consists of work and classes but still I have missed writing. Sooo with that being said I am back and will try to write at least once a week from now on (forgive me if I don’t occasionally lol I’m only a person).

            I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching and assessing my life so far (I guess since my birthday’s coming up I got all nostalgic and what not lol!) and I realized just how much I miss being a kid and the lack of responsibility. Like now the first thing people ask me when they see me is so what’s your major? Or what do you want to be? And I’m just here like ummmmm idk lol a lawyer? I study communication? Like I miss the days when the first thing people would ask me would be how old are you? What do you like to do? What’s your favorite subject in school? All I wanna know is when did that stop? I get that people aren’t worried about how old I am but to be completely honest I’m still not sure where I’m headed in life (mom if you’re reading this I still wanna be a lawyer lol! Your tuition money is not going to waste!) But like seriously I miss not worrying about health insurance and what majors will help me get a job or having to pay off student loans after school, the stress of worrying is overwhelming!

            Above all I miss SLEEP. Honestly I can’t tell you the last time that I got 6 consecutive hours of sleep (thank God for Dunkin & Starbucks) I legitimately only function because of coffee. And this isn’t a rant I am thankful that I was able to grow and come into the independent woman I am today but like I now realize how easy I had it before and how ungrateful I was. When I was 11 I wanted to be 13, when I was 13 I wanted to be 16 because I didn’t realize how easy life was then (now I’m 20 and want to be 6 again lol!) And I heard it all before, to stop wishing I was older and cherish each year before responsibilities (but of course I didn’t listen) but I have come to reminisce about all the time I had before and I miss it. I miss being dependent, not having to do things for myself and not just sleeping at night but having naptime too!

            At the end of the day I am so proud of how far I’ve come through all of my accomplishments and tribulations and I love the independent woman that I am and if I had the chance I would not change one step of the journey that brought me to this point. But I would definitely take a few more naps along the way…you know for good measure ;).