2k14 Thats a Wrap

   So I was debating whether I wanted to make this blog post that cliché super nostalgic post about all of the amazing experiences I was blessed with in 2014 and the resolutions that I had going into 2015 or not. I chose not. To be completely frank I’m really not into the idea of New Year’s resolutions, I think that they’re a nice idea but that we become so enamored with the idea of a new beginning we make lists of things we’re “going to definitely do” and then when it actually comes time to doing them, we just don’t…because “there’s always next year.” So this year I’m doing something different. No Resolutions, just goals. Goals that I’m making my personal mission to see done before New Year’s Eve 2016. And to keep me honest I’m making it a public blog so you guys can call me out on it if you see me slacking. Without further ado here are the goals I plan on getting done before January 1^st, 2016.

1.   Get the tattoo I’ve had picked for the past 6 months yet have not had the courage to get.

2.   Go away for a semester (preferably abroad)

3.   Decide what I’m going to do with my life after I graduate Temple next May.

4.   SKY DIVING

5.   Say yes to new experiences (whether that means trying new foods, going to unknown new places, or getting involved in new activities.)

6.   Actually writing at least one blog post a week, so altogether 52 for this year.

And finally

7.   Letting go of all the troubles, grudges, pain, and conflict that 2014 brought with it.

I know I say this every year but 2014, by far has been one of the greatest years of my life. It has been a year of lessons and realizations for me; between figuring out who I am as a person, woman, friend, and figuring out what makes me happy, and where I fit in. I have realized the value of true friendship, of just how important family is, and I have come to terms with my own mortality, and how because of this every single moment you have with the people that you love is both invaluable and extremely precious, for that moment will never exist again. I have learned that remaining angry with people is a waste of energy and time, something which we already do not have much of and ultimately only harms you. And finally I have learned that I can’t do it all on my own despite how badly I may want to, and you know what? That’s okay because I don’t have to. I cannot even begin to express how thankful I am for the amazing people I have in my life from my parents, to my family, to the incredible friends I have been blessed with who have not only stuck by my side through this roller coaster ride of a year, but have made it the unforgettably amazing year that it was. I hope that each and every one of you has an incredible New Years Eve and that 2015 brings you health, happiness, and many blessings! 

Life Doesn't Wait

        So basically I failed at writing for a few weeks. To be honest emotionally I wasn't in the mood to write, you know when life hits you hard with something (a situation, moment, problem etc). Well it's been a rough couple of weeks man, (not that that's any excuse for not keeping up with my blog of course.) However, I am back and my post today is gonna actually be about one of my biggest fears in life. 

         Recently, I saw this video called Life Doesn't Wait by one of my absolute favorite YouTubers Connor Franta, (link below) in which he goes into detail about how we should be doing what makes us happy in life because we never know how long we have, and that really resonated with me. One of my biggest fears in life has to be that I choose a career or path that won't make me happy, or that I won't love doing, and I'll be stuck doing it for the next 50+ years, or until I die, and that scares me to no end. 

           Given some circumstances outside of my control recently, I've really come to terms with just how short life is, and how in the blink of an eye, we ourselves or someone we care about could be gone...and that's it. There's no remedy for that and it's freaking scary. With that being said, I refuse to spend any more of time doing anything except what makes me happy, or passionate. I refuse to let my worries about the future, or fear of the unknown stop me from pursuing what I love or doing what I know will ultimately make me happy in the long run. I will also stop trying to maintain relationships with people who honestly don't seem to really care or have an interest in being/ spending time with me.

           These last few weeks have really given me time to think through my life choices, and have helped me get to a much better place than I've ever been in before. I refuse to settle for less effort from others than I'm putting forth, and I refuse to waste any more time on things/ people that have no benefit for me and are only bringing me down. And you shouldn't either! 

             Pick a career, friends, schools, clubs etc. based on more than just how they can benefit you in the long run. Pick friends/partners based on the love and support they show you when you're down, and how much higher they can lift you when you're up. Never give someone the power to tear you down, and if you feel a person doesn't value you, then extract them from your life, you're worth so much more than that. Pursue the hobbies and career that make you want to wake up every day to do them and that leave you feeling passionate and satisfied, and take chances...lots of them! Because at the end of the day the worst mistake you can make is leaving yourself wondering what could have been, would have been, or should have been had you taken that one chance. Do it before it's too late. 

30 Random Facts abouta Random

           Soooooo yeah I'm only like 2 weeks late putting up a new post....whoops, but in my defense honestly I just don't understand how the days have been flying by so quickly but I'm back...I think. Today I decided I'd do something a little different and tell you a little about myself, despite not being very interesting soooo without further ado here's 30 completely random (but true) facts about me....leggo 

30 Random Facts about me 

1. I’m only 5’0 and 3/4…and I was once told I was 5’2 which made my entire life until I went back to the doctors they said I had obviously shrunk cause I'm really only 5'0…needless to say it was a sad day
2. Autumn is my favorite season, but Christmas is my favorite time of the year 
3. I can’t honestly say I don’t have a best friend….why? Because my closest friends are legit family to me
4. I did karate….for like a day…cause I decided to be all dique bad ass and show off what I learned in class that day and ended up breaking my arm in the same place again 
5. I’m endlessly competitive especially in Mario Kart like shit will get real, words will be said…warning 
6. My favorite series is a tie between Harry Potter and the Fast and Furious series and the Hunger Games (November 21 and April 3rd can’t come soon enough) 
7. I can’t walk straight in flats, but I walk perfectly in heels…problems 
8. I’m legitimately the clumsiest person ever, like honestly if I had a dollar for every time I’ve walked into a wall or tripped up the stairs -__- 
9. I’m a very open person and pretty open minded 
10. It takes a lot to get me mad, it’s very rare for me to get upset but when that does happen I tend to get over things really quickly 
11. COFFEE is life tbh 
12. I’m honestly a terrible texter, I’ll completely forget to write back unless I genuinely want to talk to you 
13. I can’t go a day without texting the bae, aka Sandra  
14. My favorite place I’ve been to so far is New York <3 all day every day 
15. I could see myself (and plan on) living in Washington DC at some point in my life, but eventually I plan on making NY my home 
16. I’m a card HOARDER, any time I get a birthday or Christmas card that someone took the time to write in I put it up on my wall, they mean the world to me 
17. I would love to live in the West Coast for like a year 
18. I’m determined to go backpacking across Europe 
19. Feelings wise, I’m like the most ungirly girl, I don’t do very well with emotions 
20. I like my money exactly where I can see it, in my closet 
21. I’m worry more about the people I care about then I do for myself to be honest
22. My life will be complete when I see J. Cole and the Weeknd in concert 
23. Romeo Santos will forever be bae 
24. I can (and have) spent an entire day watching Youtubers Tyler Oakley, Casper Lee, and Thatcher Joe videos and binge watching the Mindy Project 
25. I could honestly (and would if I could) spend a full day watching movies 
26. Favorite movie at the moment: Purge Anarchy, think I’ve seen it 20 times and I’ll probably watch it a few more times 
27. I tend to get tired of things very quickly, I constantly crave change 
28. I almost died of appendicitis because I kept trying to convince the doctor that I was fine so that I could go home 
29. I legitimately dislike with an intense passion the movie Frozen, so much so that this sentence isn’t even grammatically correct 
30. The simplest things make me beyond happy, I'm not a person who really cares for material or expensive things, get me coffee or a red velvet cupcake and I'll love you forever <3 jk all those feelings but still like you will have made my day 

A Little Appreciation Never Hurt

             So I was sitting in the library studying for my final midterm (FINALLY!) when I started thinking about how many bad things have been happening not just in the world, but also to the people around me, and that have happened to me. And then I thought about how before each of my midterms I always said, “Lord please help me pass this test, I know I should have studied better but please help me get a semi decent grade.” Now for those of you who don’t know me I was born Catholic, personally I don’t identify with it, I’m more of a spiritual person, but then what hit me was that after I would get my results back (I passed 3 out of 5, haven’t gotten my grades for the last 2 yet) I never really said thank you. And then it hit me, I haven’t really shown my appreciation for all of the blessings in my life in a while, and that made me really sad, so I felt what better way to show my appreciation for it than with a blog post! So here are just a couple of the myriad of things/people I have no words to express my appreciation for.

1.     My parents (yes both of them equally)- honestly I don’t know where I would be without these two. They could not be any more different but both have helped form me into the woman I am today, and both have done everything in their power to equip me with all wisdom and opportunities that they felt would help me become the most successful and self-sufficient woman I could be. I will never be able to fully express the gratitude for all of their sacrifices for me over the years.

2.     My friends/family. Yes I set both of them up in the same category, why? Because my best friends have become members of my family, they’ve shown me nothing but unconditional support and have accepted me completely as I am, and to me that matters more than blood.

3.     Anyone and everyone that told me that I couldn’t do something. You pushed me harder than any of my supporters could…why? Because there is nothing I love more than a challenge, and proving someone wrong, for me the sky isn’t even the limit.

4.     All of the mistakes and bad choices that I have made in life. Yeah it sucked in the moment, and the consequences of the aftermath of those choices had to be worse, but ultimately each mistake I made helped shape me and led me to where I am today, and to be completely honest at this point in my life I love where I am, what I’m doing and the future looks bright, so how could I not be thankful for those mistakes.

5.     All of the people who have supported me throughout the years. To be honest this category is mainly made up of family and friends, but I’m beyond thankful for the teachers and professors who have offered me nothing but unconditional regard over the years, pushing me to work harder through their constructive criticism and never letting me bullshit a paper or test, I will never be able to fully show my appreciation for that push.

I think sometimes we (or at least me) get so consumed and busy with our everyday lives that we forget to be appreciative for the little things that keep us going. And this doesn’t just apply to the big gestures, the same appreciation can and should be shown when someone waits a little longer to hold the door open for you, or when someone gives you a genuine compliment, hell even a small smile when you’re having a bad day should be appreciated (I mean come on Philadelphians are known for many things, kindness is not one of them). And we should definitely remember to show appreciation for the people who play central roles in our lives, because although they know you love them, feeling that someone notices and actually appreciates the things you do for them everyday makes life all the better.

A Reso-Promise

     So today’s blog post is going to be a promise of sorts, or maybe a halfway through the semester, no where New Years, New Years resolution…well you can interpret it in whatever way you would like lol. And I have a specific reason why I want to share this not really a resolution but basically a resolution with you, which I will make clear at the end of the post. So ready for the resolution/promise?

     The resolution/promise (legit don’t know how to define it) I want to make is to stop being on my phone so much. Now you might be wondering (well those of you know me semi well lol) why would a person who is studying communication want to not be interacting with the technology that makes communication so accessible? Simple. I want to be more involved in my own life, and be more involved in the lives of the people I love. Say wha?

     Being on campus and doing some assignments involving media use, I’ve come to the conclusion that those devices that once made speaking with a relative that is so far away so feasible, is not the reason that relationships fail and the basis on which we construct our culture. Sitting in a lecture hall for 85 minutes I see students who cannot even put their phone down for 15 minutes to absorb at lease a segment of the lesson that is being taught to them because they need to constantly check what is “going on in the world” when ironically they’re missing what is going on in their own worlds! As a society we have become so engrossed in the need to be updated all the time on what we think we’re missing out on that we actually miss out on the moments that make the best memories, because they are our own moments that should be something we could look back on and we don’t, because we did not take advantage of it.

     Before this semester I felt like I could talk to say my mom or my friends in person and check my Instagram feed or respond to a text message because I could multitask and not miss anything. Well it turns out I was wrong. Now you can say that maybe it’s just me, that I lack the skills to efficiently multitask, but the fact of the matter is you miss the whole point of the face-to-face communication process when you just listen with your ears. Along with hearing what the person is saying, their body language and facial expressions are also contributing to the conversation and that has been completely missed because you were sending that “quick text,” therefore a possible memorable moment is gone.

     Okay so now the reason I’ve put this reso-promise (yes I made the word up since I still can’t decide what to call it) I want you guys to help me ensure that I stick with it. If you’re with me and see me pull out my phone just to scroll call me out on it. If you see me [failing] at multitasking because I’m consistently checking my social media accounts say something. I want you guys to call me out when you see that I slip up and that I’m not going through with my reso-promise, because I really want to follow through with this.

     When I reflect back later on in life I want to ensure that I have a plethora of amazing memories to laugh about because I know that I was able to fully live my life to the fullest, which I know will not happen if social media plays such a big part in my daily life, so it’s time for a change. And who knows maybe I’ll even become a more productive student….wellll one can always dream (;

Won't Settle

So I’ve been contemplating writing this blog post for a while, since in a way it is kind of personal but at the same time I’m like if I’m going through this there has to be plenty of other people who feel the same way…so I’ve decided to just go ahead and write about it. What is it? Is probably what you’re asking right now lol, well hold on I’ll get to that in a second, first I wanna clarify the back story on the catalyst of what made me decide to write about this topic.

            I swear I get asked this all the time do I have a boyfriend, to which I respond no I don’t and then I get one of two responses either the person doesn’t believe me and thinks I have some hidden boyfriend (pssh I wish Romeo you know that’s all you;) [Santos for all people who don’t know the Romeo I’m referring to lol] or they’re like but why not?

            My response to the first response is quite frankly despite the fact that I am a private person (I like my private life to remain private) if I had a boyfriend I wouldn’t keep him a secret, there’s really no need for that and ultimately that secrecy can tear apart a relationship. I’m not a person that would be blowing up anyone’s Instagram feeds with pictures of my boyfriend and I, but my friends and family would definitely know who he was, and publically people would know I was taken, but according to my Facebook status I’m currently single so obviously I have no secret boyfriend.

            My response to that second response gets a little more complicated. The reason that I don’t have a boyfriend is not because I don’t want one, I mean I’m not actively seeking a relationship, but should I meet the right person I wouldn’t be opposed to dating, the only problem is the guys of this generation. Honestly, I’ve met some pretty good guys, but the majority of them were either already taken or weren’t interested in girls which sucked…and the rest of the guys I’ve met just were not interested in something serious. I’m not the type of girl that is looking for just another hookup or to “chill” (honestly what even is this whole thing with chilling, like I’m not your bro). And I don’t want a guy who has been with half of the Philadelphia Metropolitan Area (being with thatttt many people is kind of a huge turn off).

            Honestly what I want is a man, not a boy thinking he’s a man, to ask me out on a DATE (again chill is for bro’s) and not to want a relationship per say, but who wants to get to know the actual me, not just the physical me or the me that he thinks I am. I want a man who is going to call instead of text me and who is going to understand that I am a full time student working two jobs, so I don’t have much time, and who instead of being turned off by that is going to stand by me and support me through it all. A person who wants me to succeed and pushes me to be a better version of myself….is that too much to ask for? Cause to be honest I refuse to settle for anything less than that.